  | | Tuesday, August 31
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| | Bruce has resurfaced from Romania (sans camera) but word comes that en route he was indoctrinated into some sort of fringe religious cult with a curious devotion to polyester blends. He assures me he is "blissful" and "busy" preparing his doomsday space pod and knitting hemp hammocks he hopes will be picked up by Pier One. He is seated with his "new family," including our good friends Margaret and George, who seem to have undergone a conversion of their own.
| | Friday, August 27
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| | There will be no further pictures from Europe...Bruce lost my camera, actually it was stolen by gypsies in Romania and, no, he didn't know what hit him.
Well, D-day (demonstration day) is upon those of you in New York and all I have to say is drink lots of water, make sure your protest signs are witty and urbane and that they're of proper dimensions, don't carry a megaphone or you'll be arrested and if you venture to Central Park, don't trod on the daisies.
| | Wednesday, August 25
| | Europaland Diaries | |
| | Bruce continues his whirlwind trip through Europe (which I should be on, grrr). Here's a shot of his latest destination, Cluj, Romania! That's Transylvannia to you and me. Looks much too scenic for blood-sucking vampires, no?
These Swift Boat people are driving me crazy! Have they no shame? Grrr...
| | Tuesday, August 24
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| | Hey yall, Bruce is in London! That's him in front of St Paul's. I would have tagged along, but I've been BUSY at work, grrr, hence the long lag in posts. But things seem to be heading back to the office equilibrium — which is usually comprised of magazine-reading, cell-phone-chatting slackerdom. So regular posts should be back soon.
By the way, would someone kindly fill me in on what's going on with the Olympics, because all I am getting over here is Chinese people playing heated matches of table tennis. Who knew it was such a dramatic sport? I mean the sweat pouring off these people!
| | Thursday, August 12
| | Kumbaya | | Aiyah! Busy week at work. Cross-cultural communications can be tough, especially when it comes to negotiating grammatical issues of magazine copy with people who are speaking English as a second language. You get what people out here like to call "Chinglish," which is basically Chinese that has gone through the translation process and come out the other end a little bizarre. An example: "The cow jumped over the moon" becomes "The flying cow of the night climbed the sky moon over the side." Or something like that.
Anyone with an interest in Asia should check out Time Asia's issue last week, a special issue dubbed Asian Journey: In Search of the Sublime. There's the requisite ode to Hong Kong girlie bar culture, but also great stories on Nepal, Thailand, Bhutan, India and tons of photos. Most compelling is the sweet, sad story of Mo Yunxiu, a teenage girl who leaves her simple little village in China to seek a job in a factory in big, bad Shenzhen. She is so unaccustomed to life in a megalopolis that at one point she is wandering around a huge apartment complex thinking it might house a factory. As I said, sweet and sad. Read it!
Well, the Republicans and their Bible-thumping minions will soon be setting up shop in Sodom, I mean Gotham, for the big convention. I used to think the convention would provide the perfect opportunity for New Yorkers to unleash their grievances and take it to the streets. Then I read this piece by Norman Mailer about how Bush strategists are hoping for anarchist mayhem, thinking it would turn off moderate voters, and possibly even agitating for it by planting fake anarchists! It's all so Machiavellian and creepy! So people, be on your best behavior! Opt for bright, camera-friendly color schemes, sing happy, perky protest songs, bring your grandma and for God's sake, don't burn the flag!
| | Friday, August 6
| | Under the Weather | | Sorry I have been offline the past few days. A suitcase full of counterfeit DVDs wasn't the only thing I brought back with me from China. No, little did I know, but stowing along on the ride was a virus, one I'd like to characterize as multi-talented, like an old-style Broadway performer. He sang, he danced, he tapped, he told bad jokes, he took questions from the audience, and he asked for a tip before moving on to the next sorry tourist in town. The only way to kill him was to sleep, which I did for most of the past 72 hours. Aiyah! Thank God it's over.
But here is a question, not to rip on my friends in good ol' China, but whenever we Hong Kongers take the little jaunt across the sea to the motherland, we inevitable come back Illin, Half Dead, SICK! Are they poisoning us for the fact that Hong Kong wants the vote?! Or is it just plain not up to code over there? What are they going to do when the Olympics come to town? Better stock up on the antibiotics en masse. Anyway, be back with posts very soon.
PS: Lies and the lying liars who tell them.
| | Monday, August 2
| | China of the Mind | |
| | Visiting Yangshuo was like going to China for the first time. With its mythical landscape, dreamlike karst peaks and soft flowing Li Jiang river, it has served as inspiration for Chinese poets and painters for centuries. Situated in Guangxi Province, which borders Vietnam, it offers an altogether different experience from China's crowded, crazy metropolises. In Yangshuo you see a gentler way of life, a truer, timeless China...and it quietly blows you away. | |
| | Me going "Wow." | |
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| | Bruce having his own "wow" moment. | |
| | I'm not just being a goofy tourist in a funny hat, the sun is hot out on the water. | |
| | Wait I've seen this before... | |
| | ...on the $20 RMB note! Pretty cool. | |
| | You know the drippy lines you see on traditional Chinese landscape paintings, this is where it comes from, weathered limestone peaks. | |
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| | Rice stalks dry in the sun. | |
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| | Yangshuo village itself has quaint charms. If you want to disappear from your life, this is the place to go. You can live pretty well on $10 a day and no one will ever find you! | |
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| | The crazy birdman, one of many eccentric personalities we came across. | |
| | Yangshuo has become a mecca for backpackers, with its laidback lifestyle, cheap guesthouses and cafes. More music in the streets than I've seen anywhere in the Middle Kingdom. | |
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| | Nightlife along West Street (named for its string of Western style restaurants). | |
| | Great Wall Red is yum, dry with a woodsy bouquet. Why did I want to go back to civilization again? I think I'm staying. Look, I've already found a job...who's with me? | |
| | Thursday, July 29
| | You just have to love this. Snooty, lazy and seriously strung out restaurant workers in the oh so posh Hamptons get what's coming to them after being arrogant and rude to the one person in the whole entire world who can mete out some serious revenge. The New York Times food critic.
"It's pan-roasted in the oven, no, wait, oven-roasted in a pan, in an oven, um, wait." OK, I am heading out to Guilin and Yangzhou to explore the fabled Chinese countryside. See you real soon.
| | Wednesday, July 28
| | Parental Discretion Is Advised | | Bill Clinton is the Mac Daddy!
Let's clone him and keep him around. Where was this Al Gore four years ago?
Don't you get the impression Al Gore has been layin low, hangin round the house in a Dead shirt, spinning 'out there' theories on the ozone, hittin a bong and listening to Jefferson Airplane? Theresa Heinz Kerry needs to lay off the Vicodin
Ok, I know there is a double standard. The current Vice President of the United States can besmirch the genteel halls of the Capitol by telling a prominent senator to "Go Fuck himself." But Theresa Heinz Kerry, in a rare moment of lucidity, can't tell a sleazebag right wing reporter to "Shove it!" without catching a boatload of flack from the media, who collectively exhibit the maturity level of a 3rd grader. I only regret she didn't use the full breadth of the phrase ("...up your ass!") I mean, what the fuck? I say, curse America! Curse long and hard and from the diaphragm! It will make you feel better. Like when you stub your toe and all you can say is M***** F***! and it some how relieves the pain.
But that isn't the only trouble Theresa Heinz Kerry has gotten into this week. There is also Cookiegate and the Mystery of the Unpleasant Spiced Pumpkin Cookies. And lest we forget the Jack Edwards Faux Pas where she tried to yank John Edward's son Jack's thumb out his mouth in front of a million cameras. No, we have to come to terms with the fact that THK appears to be emerging more and more as a kind of Crazy Aunt Who Lives Upstairs figure. What trouble will she get into next? I can already see her in a sketch on Saturday Night Live drinking from the dog bowl or frosting a cake with shaving cream. Someone better put a minder on that one. Etc:
Good article on the remake of The Manchurian Candidate. It's always the husband.
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